Changing of the Guard…dogs
Kyle “Darth” Stater
1) Where are you from?
Hello IFL! Clevland Kyle here, stoked to be a part of this great league. I’m from Santa Rosa, CA. Not married, no kids, I do what I want when I want. I’m a sales manager for a wine & spirits distributor and I try to play golf every weekend.
2) After reading through the bylaws, seeing some of the content, the site, the chat, etc.. What are your first impressions of this league?
This looks to be the most well planned out league I’ve seen in my 15+ years of playing Fantasy Football. Very impressed with the whole set up as well as the participation from all the members. It really adds an awesome new dimension to being in a fantasy football league. We’ve all been in those boring leagues where no one chats or posts much during the year. This looks to be the total opposite of that, so looking forward to this year and being a part for many more years.
3) What is your favorite real world NFL team?
Commish commentary: *sigh* I grew up in the bay as well, except I got to watch all my friends watch their 90s 49ers dynasty win repeatedly meanwhile my precious fins continously fell short, and Marino tore his achilles like poor frisbee Nate.
4) What possessed you to select the Cleveland Browns?
As we all know, I’ve taken over the abandoned Cleveland Browns under a bad circumstance. Not my place to discuss what happened before I got here. The funny thing about it is that there are a lot of parallels to real life with this franchise, they’re definitely in a down period. I accept the challenge though, I want to make this once proud organization historic again. A lot to be proud of being president of this team even though we are going through a rough offseason.
5) After looking over your initial roster, what are your impressions of the previous Cleveland GM?
No surprises here, the offense needs some work. That’s all I want to reveal in my opening interview.
6) What do you predict will be your record this year? Next year?
Being my first year in this league set up I’m not completely sure how things will play out. 8-8 might be a great year for this team, but you never know. Looking forward to the season starting. All these predictions go out the window week 1.
7) How many years of a) fantasy football & b) dynasty have you played?
I don’t remember my first year playing FF, but its got to be in the 15-20 year range.
8) It is our understanding that you already know a few of the other GMs in this league?
I definitely do know some of the other GM’s in this league. I grew up in the same neighborhood as Baltimore Matt and Josh.0. The three of us have a long history of being very competitive at FF/Madden, so I’m looking forward to competing against these guys in a league like this. I also know a few other guys from other leagues, you and I were in the VNFDL together, also I played in “Damn it’s Hot” with Minnesota Wade.
Commish commentary: “Damn it’s Hot” is a 12 team redraft league run by Hell Raven.
9) You and Matt “Hell Raven” have a storied past in terms of fantasy football. Now that you both reside in the AFC North, you have to expect that he will use his radio show as a platform to trash you. How are you going to respond?
Yes we do have some history from Damn its Hot. We don’t have a lot of historic competition in that league because my team Darth Stater has dominated, he knows that and cant deny it. I’ve won that league multiple times while he’s still sitting on 0 championships.
10) There are a handful of openings left in the newly formed International Basketball League, do you follow the NBA, nd do you have any interest in that league?
At this time I have no interest in fantasy basketball.
Commish commentary: The IBL is now full.
11) If you could have one QB throughout the history of the NFL as your franchise QB today, who would it be?
See answer #3, I already proved that Montana is the GOAT! And please don’t anyone say fucking Tom Brady is better. He lost 2 Super Bowls plus his team has been caught cheating multiple times. The only thing he has on Montana is longevity and that because the game was more physical in the 80’s.
12) What IFL team do you think poses the biggest threat this year? (Either conference)
At this point, I’m only worried about the teams in my division. Especially Baltimore, that team has hurt the people of Cleveland and I want to make them pay for that. YOU HEAR ME SHITBIRDS?!?!
13) Which two NFL teams do you predict will be in the Super Bowl this year? Who will win?
I’m not big on predictions, like I said earlier, everything changes once week one starts.
14) If you could bring one musician back from the dead, who would it be and why?
Commish commentary: Commish commentary: The Way Forward
As part of our contract amnesty for GMs entering the league, Cleveland is eligible to void up to 5 contracts up front, as well as to set the contract lengths for anyone currently signed to the team (rookie contracts excluded).
Cleveland released a statement thanking the following players for their brief stint with team. Releasing these players today frees up a total of 1.8m in salary cap this year, and 2m in salary cap in 2017.
- Eddie Pleasant – Safety – $600,000
- Brice McCain – Cornerback – $600,000
- Danny Lansanah – Linebacker – $600,000
In addition to voided contracts, the following player contract lengths have been adjusted.
- Preston Brown – Linebacker – $5,100,000
New Contract Length: 2 Years
Old Contract Length: 3 Years
- James Laurinaitas – Linebacker – $3,025,000
New Contract Length: 1 Year
Old Contract Length: 2 Years